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Thursday, December 12, 2013

Hope & Strength

I've always hope that thing will get better...
No matter how hard life has brought me down...
Might cry and complain and make a fuss about it...
But I've always hold on...
Lessons from the past taught me not to say words that hurt...
Especially when you're not thinking rationally...
I never say anything like that these days...
Perhaps it's coz of Karma as I keep getting those words back...
Now I guess I need to have little faith, trust and pixie dust to overcome it....
I need extra boost of strength to hold on...
Hope that everything will turn out just fine..


Now...
Any idea where to get my pixie dusts??



20131212    1.54PM

Thursday, December 5, 2013

Just Love & Care

Girls like diamonds, roses, little gifts, romantic gifts....
Sometimes they are materialistic..And realistic...
Gifts.. Big or small.. Makes them happy...

Well, I'm a girl...
But in order to be happy...I don't need stuffs..
Yes, I'll be glad if people gift me things...
But that's temporary.. The happiness and satisfaction just won't last long...
I've been asking myself for a long time..

"What's the thing that I need the most?"

And I guess I had the answer..
I need affection.. To feel love.. To be cared..

I don't know.. Maybe it's the thing that I went through when I was younger..
I'm a attention seeking kid back then..
Always seek for love and words of care from parents and friends...
But it all ended up the opposite way..
Yes I've got the attention.. 
But at the same time I've got rejections, denials, words of hatred...
And I've got caned and locked away as well...

I've always been insecure...
Easily scared...
So I protected myself...
My heart has been broken.. I tried to put it back in shape..
Still there's some unfound pieces...
The already shattered heart has been sealed for a very long time...
It'll only be opened to those whom I think are trustable... But there's only 3 of them..
No more..

The key to unlock it is easy..
It doesn't need gold or platinum or diamonds...
Definitely doesn't need roses or rings or any stuffs...
All it needs is some love and affection...
A simple hug that reacts from the heart will do...
I'll tend to cry when people hugs me... 
And cry harder when I'm initially crying...
But don't worry, it's a sign of relieve...
Simply means that my broken heart is being soothed, that it feels it.. The affection..

Unfinished business that prolonged from chilhood I guess...
Sometimes I feel that I'm still like a kid...
You might tell me that I can create my own strength and value... That I can be strong on my own..
But the thing is.. I've been strong on my own for a very long time..
I just need a break in between...
Just someone there for me...
Yes.. I need someone too :(((

Who will be there when I need them most??

20131205    2.52PM

Sunday, October 20, 2013

Quote Of The Day

" Of course I'll hurt you. Of course you'll hurt me. Of course we will hurt each other. But this is the very condition of existence. To become spring, means accepting the risk of winter. To become presence, means accepting the risk of absence."

- The Little Prince





20131020     8.48PM

累,泪

一直都是我主动说话~
一直都是我主动说想见~
一直都是我主动说想抱了~
我真的不是主动的人,那不是我的性格~
不知道.. 真的不知道为什么我会这样...
只知道在你面前我无法伪装...

可是,主动久了,会累~
我累了...
累到不想说什么...
累到不想反抗...
累到...不想在乎了...
累了,想放弃了...

放弃,能吗?
我知道你一定会说..
"只要你开心就好,我无所谓.."
这类的话,会让我更难过..
难过的是,你没有挽留~
难过的是,这样的话让我觉得无论我去或留,你都无所谓...
难过的是,虽然你说不是这样,但我还是觉得自己有多么不重要,多么渺小...

眼泪掉了~
不想再想了~

20131020    6.06PM

Saturday, October 19, 2013

Behind That Skin

Might seems tough on the outside..
But behind that mask there's a very small heart..
That's easily frightened..
Easily broken..
The reason that I'm not dare to take that move..
Is mainly because I'm too afraid to lose..
Too afraid to experience the break of the heart again..
I just wish that this moments lasts..
Sadly, the fact won't let it just paused..
I have to move on..
So let's just move on with another stronger mask..
Strong enough to cover those scars..



='(


20131019    12.39AM

Friday, October 18, 2013

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Only Girls Will Understand

Bad day~~!!!!
Head spinning...
Hand shaking...
Ankle pain...
Back aching...
AND FUCKING CRAMP!!!!
It's not helping at all no matter what posture I'm in :(((((
Urghh~!!!!!

Can't I just be guy for a sec??!!!
:((((


20131016    2.57PM

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